Guest Writer: Cosleeping: I’m doing it wrong – or am I?

Today, I am honored to share this guest post from MendyLady with you.  The anti-cosleeping campaign in Milwaukee has stirred up controversy, when safe cosleeping is quite simple. Don’t drink or do drugs while cosleeping, don’t cosleep if you have a medical condition that makes it unsafe for those around you, and use common sense about how your family sleeps.

The safest place for children to sleep is with their parents. It has been heavily researched. It is a practice used by the majority of the world today. It is the biological norm for mammals. For more information, please see the resources at the bottom of this post.

The scare tactics used by  the media are uninformed and harmful. Whether cosleeping, bedsharing or another sleeping arrangement works for your family, making informed choices should be supported by everyone.

Most importantly, the incorrect information can cause parents lose sight of the many benefits cosleeping can give. One such benefit is the bonding in quiet family moments that only we get to see. I invite you to peak into in one of those private moments now…

MendyLadyCoSleep

MendyLady CoSleep

We cosleep. We bedshare.

We do it with pillows and blankets and a duvet, on our backs and on our bellies.  We don’t kick the cats out – honestly, would that really work?

We don’t do it drunk, or drugged, or smoking.  We do it to help all of us sleep better – the 11 month old nursing on cue all night, the 3 year old with nightmares, the mother and father who need to be able to function during the day.  We all start in our own spaces, but most mornings I wake up snuggled between my two sweetly sleeping girls.

My very favorite mothering moments are those few precious mornings when I wake just before them, pressed close between their warm bodies.  My nursling stirs, roots for my breast, and latches on for a morning suckle; my preschooler wiggles ’round in the crook of my arm until she can see me, smiles sleepily, and breathes “I love you Mommy.”

Katie Boyd is breastfeeding, babywearing, bedsharing, knitting mama and birth junkie who blogs (rarely) at Lazy Kate and tweets (profusely) as Mendylady.

Let’s spread the positive side of CoSleeping and Bedsharing. Do you have a special co-sleeping moment that you would like to share? I would love to hear from you.

NaBloPoMo 2011

9 thoughts on “Guest Writer: Cosleeping: I’m doing it wrong – or am I?

  1. I totally enjoyed reading the whole story. I am one of those people who couldn’t sleep without somebody with me. I got used to it since I was a kid and I think it will be forever until I die.

    Best,
    Frenks

  2. I love your story. I’m a dad of my one and only child and he doesn’t sleep without me on his side. I kind of used to it and yeah it’s very refreshing to wake up seeing him at my side.

  3. Pingback: I Let Mama Sleep in the Big Bed « TouchstoneZ

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  5. My son likes to go to sleep clutching me, his face pressed up against mine, fingers entwined in my hair. I wouldn’t sleep that way with his father (if he wanted to). It’s OK and sweet only because he is such a little person and I am his one and only mother. And when your child is a baby, they are so happy to see you when they wake up and you are right there. Yeah, people who are against or afraid of cosleeping are missing out… on a lot more than just better sleep.

  6. I love reading posts like this! We are also a family of co-sleepers. Nothing fills my heart with more joy than waking up to see my children’s faces. It amazes me that so many people think co-sleeping is dangerous, period. It’s so important to make the distinction between safe and unsafe co-sleeping.

  7. While I was pregnant with my son I said I would never co-sleep. Then my son arrived via c-section. I was alone in my hospital (for a few minutes) room with my son beside me in a bassinet and I could hardly move to pick him up as he fussed. That was it my son started to sleep on my chest from that moment on. He had a few naps in his bassinet at home but that didn’t last. He is now 18 months old and we happily co-sleep and he nurses through the night. I love the moments in the morning as well. Wjen he wakes and wants to play right away and he always has a smile for mama. Its wonderful to co-sleep!

  8. I have coslept with all four of my children. Two are out, and two are still in our bed. We recently adopted our youngest child. He had never slept with anyone and was left to cry in his crib, which was kept in front of a tv that was on 24/7. The first night home, I assumed he would prefer to sleep alone, since that’s what he’d done for his entire six months on Earth. He fell asleep in my arms, bottlefeeding. I carefully placed him in a “safe” baby bed. He lasted maybe five minutes before he began to protest. I picked him up and gave him more of his bottle. I tried to put him down alone again, and this time, he started crying immediately. That was it! I lay down with my new son, and we went to sleep. Lying there, I truly felt like his mother.

    I’ve read the warnings about not sleeping with a formula fed baby. I get the concerns, and I hope I’m not just making this up for my own benefit, but I think I am unique in regards to cosleeping while bottlefeeding. I had already done it with my three biological, 100% breastfed babies. With my new son, I wake when he stirs-before he cries. I am as aware of him as I was the others, even though it’s a silicone nipple I pop in his mouth during the night. If he’d been a newborn when he came home, I might have been too scared to “break the rules” but since he was already a sturdy little guy, who would have cried had I rolled over on him, I went for it.

  9. My favourite mothering moments are also usually cosleeping. Waking up with my boy in my arms, the sigh of satisfaction as he latches on without needing to wake (much less cry!), and the look of pure joy on his face nearly every morning when he wakes up and sees me first.

    It breaks my heart that so many parents miss out on this joy and the benefits to their family because of fear, ignorance and misinformation.

I love comments and try to reply to each one. I look forward to connecting with you. Namaste

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