TouchstoneZ

Anjali Mudra: Namaste

I’m inspired by Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro‘s weekly gratitude post. So, I’m going to cultivate a little more gratitude in my life by joining her on a quest to be thankful until we absolutely exude gratitude. I hope you’ll also join Amanda in sharing just five things you are thankful for this week. Thank you to Amanda for helping bring back genuine gratitude.

This week I am grateful for:

• My partner. He’s always there. In fact, he never leaves (even when I thought I wanted him to.) I’m so glad he has stayed. I’m happy he has supported and love no matter what. I’m trying to take more time to remember that and speak it aloud to him. So, here’s another opportunity to say it.

• Hugs. Virtual and real. Hugs are my absolute favorite thing to give and to receive. I’m not picky either. They do not have to be spontaneous. I’ll take any I can get. I am a hugger, although I try to be respectful and ask first.

• Healing. Buddha baby had a scary accident last week. I’m so happy nothing was serious and he has healed so quickly. I’m grateful for our sitter who reacted perfectly so that we were able to get him to the ER right away. I’m grateful for the doctors that stitched him up and for my little boy who tolerated it all and trusted in us while his body worked to get him healed.

• Water.  I’m grateful for the ease that we have in using running hot & cold water. We practice water conservation in many areas, but if I can use a shower or bath to occupy, soothe, clean or entertain myself or my children I let go of my consumption guilt. Some days it’s all that gets us through the day.

• October weather. It was 85F at the pumpkin patch today. 85! I know the rain is coming and I’ll enjoy that, too. But these sunny, cloudless, summery days in October are a gift we have been making full use of. I always regret not getting outside more when winter arrives and we’ve been packing in a lot of outdoor activities because this weather is so special.

I feel as though I just stood under a clear waterfall. Thank you, Amanda, for reminding me to give my gratitude a voice (oops! Does that make 6?

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Anjali Mudra: Namaste

I’m inspired by Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro‘s weekly gratitude post. So, I’m going to cultivate a little more gratitude in my life by joining her on a quest to be thankful until we absolutely exude gratitude. I hope you’ll also join Amanda in sharing just five things you are thankful for this week. Thank you to Amanda for helping bring back genuine gratitude.

This week I am grateful for:

• RAOK. This month, I am participating in Mom Grooves‘ a 30 days of kindness. I’m planning to do periodic posts over the month about the experience. But, I am already reaping the benefits of looking for random acts of kindness. They make me feel so good inside. I feel like the Grinch, my heart grows 3 sizes every time I do one. By the way, Mom Grooves had got a gorgeous giveaway with her month of kindness. So, please go check it out.

• Twitter friends. Yesterday, I was feeling anxious and sad. So, I tweeted about it. There’s something intangibly different about reading support on twitter. I suppose it’s removed enough that support is easier to receive.  Just hearing from twiends that they were there and cared helped me pull it together and not to be a sobby mess in the public library. I’m grateful for my many twitter friends, in particular yesterday thank you @mendylady, @tnpbirthsrvices, and @RachaelNevins.

• The Gorram Dog. I’ve been a gentle parenting fail with her lately. She’s at the bottom of the patience totem pole in the house and often gets my annoyed voice instead of gentle pets. Dogs, even more than children, give immediate feedback on how well they’re being treated. She’s the best reminder to surrender into lovingkindness and let go of the tightness that causes me to be short.

• Halloween Books.  Thursday night, I went walking downtown with Gan. It was “Witch’s Night Out,” which meant women dressed as witches were going from business to business for free martinis, snacks, and discount shopping. They were all a bit (to a lot) tipsy. One of the witches had a green face, pointy nose, and was acting in character. This petrified Gan. She tried to sooth him, but made it worse by trying to explain that it was a costume. I checked out a Halloween book from the library that has a pop-up witch in it. Gan adores the book. He reads it by himself. He is using it to calm his fears and take his power back. He says, “Are you ready for me to show you the scary witch?” *shows page* “Boo! We saw this painted face and nose. I’m not scared of her.” If any books are going to ignite a love of reading in kids, it’s going to be Halloween books.

• The timer on my washer. This is a little one, but being able to load the washing machine and dishwasher before bed, knowing that they will run while we sleep is really helping keep up with these never-completed household tasks. I can barely motivate myself to do chores that I can’t point at and say, “Well, that’s done!” when there’s always more to be done. There’s something that cultivates contentment in going to bed knowing I’ll wake to clean dishes and clothes. It’s almost like someone else has done them for me.

I feel as though I just stood under a clear waterfall. Thank you, Amanda, for reminding me to give my gratitude a voice (oops! Does that make 6?

Read Full Post »

Anjali Mudra: Namaste

I’m inspired by Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro‘s weekly gratitude post. So, I’m going to cultivate a little more gratitude in my life by joining her on a quest to be thankful until we absolutely exude gratitude. I hope you’ll also join Amanda in sharing just five things you are thankful for this week. Thank you to Amanda for helping bring back genuine gratitude.

This week I am grateful for:

• Words. The ones that come out and the ones that come in. If I didn’t write, it would take me a long time to take the steps on my path of life. They help me sort, feel, believe, let go, and be fearless. If I didn’t read, I would consume far fewer new ideas. I think other people’s minds are fascinating. Nothing else allows a peek into them like the words of others. However imperfect communication is, it does create connection.

• Silence. I’m learning to find comfort in silence. I used to be afraid of it and it wasn’t until I had this realization that I began practicing meditation. It wasn’t until I had this realization that I stopped arguing so much with my partner just to fill that silence. Being in silence no longer means being lost alone with a forest of dark thoughts. Now I can hug whatever arises. When I can’t handle the noise, I surrender into the silence.

• Noise. I grew up an only child with a single, working and otherwise occupied parent. The noise of 6 beings (including the dog) in our small home reminds me that we are a family. Each of us is an individual who is uniquely woven into the crazy cacophany of bubblepopperlightsaberdressupcookingworkingwritingyogaingdancinglaughingfighting. When I can’t handle the silence, I surrender into the noise.

• Take Away.  I haven’t been cooking this week at all and healthy take away choices have been a boon to our family. We just went through one of those periods where we didn’t restock the kitchen and were tired of pasta. Starting over with an empty pantry will actually be a good thing as the kids can participate in the shopping and meal planning

• Elimination Communication. We’re going through one of the more enjoyable phases of ECing. At 15 months, Bud is asking to use the potty and gets royally mad at us if we’re not quick enough to recognize his requests. He takes obvious joy in his ability to make the decision when and where to exercise his bodily functions and in getting us to help him. I can’t think of too many things better for a strong-willed toddler than to exert his will in a positive way.

I feel as though I just stood under a clear waterfall. Thank you, Amanda, for reminding me to give my gratitude a voice (oops! Does that make 6?

Read Full Post »

Anjali Mudra: Namaste

I’m inspired by Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro‘s weekly gratitude post. So, I’m going to cultivate a little more gratitude in my life by joining her on a quest to be thankful until we absolutely exude gratitude. I hope you’ll also join Amanda in sharing just five things you are thankful for this week. Thank you to Amanda for helping bring back genuine gratitude.

This week I am grateful for:

• Sweet sweat. When my teacher has us holding plank forever and my body is shaking. When I don’t think I can go “5 more breaths.” There’s a bead of sweat dripping to the end of my nose that reminds me to stay focused and stop the negative self-talk. It reminds me that my body is as capable as I believe.

• Books. The only thing I cheat on my family with is with books. I escape into new knowledge or new worlds and leave my family in my mind just as much as if I ran away. And I get to come back without any pesky legal ramifications.

• A partner who banishes the big spiders and patches tires. Honoring my wishes, my partner removes the big, hairy predators outside instead of killing them-after the kids get a close-up arachnid lesson, of course. Thanks to the renovations up the street, I’ve managed to run over two roofing nails and an enormous screw within a half mile of our house in the past two months. My husband has been able to pull and patch them all.

• Readers who have emailed me personally about infant loss.  Thank you for sharing your stories with me. Thank you for connecting with me on your own healing path. There are so many who have been affected by the loss of a child. It’s only silence that can keep us isolated.

• Kelly of Becoming Crunchy and Patti of Jazzy Mama. Kelly and Patti graciously agreed to share the load in our two carnivals. Each of them have spent their very valuable time working hard to make the carnivals successful. I’m proud to call them both my Bloggy friends.

I feel as though I just stood under a clear waterfall. Thank you, Amanda, for reminding me to give my gratitude a voice (oops! Does that make 6?

Read Full Post »

Anjali Mudra: Namaste

I’m inspired by Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro‘s weekly gratitude post. So, I’m going to cultivate a little more gratitude in my life by joining her on a quest to be thankful until we absolutely exude gratitude. I hope you’ll also join Amanda in sharing just five things you are thankful for this week. Thank you to Amanda for helping bring back genuine gratitude.

This week I am grateful for:

• Bloggers who hold the space for anonymous posts. Sometimes there are things that need to get out, but are too painful to share with those who know you.

• Radical Acceptance. It’s a difficult path to healing, but it’s the only way for me to become whole again.

• Anger. I’m trying to find my gratitude for this emotion instead of running away from it. It has its purpose.

• Betrayal. Weathering the friendships that fall away. I have never been able to guess who will turn away, who will turn toward, and who will pass judgment and blame. It’s painful, but easier to know who I would not want to keep in my life and those I do.

• My husband’s family. Observing the deep love and bond they have during a time of loss reminded me of the beautiful people they are. It doesn’t matter to me whether the sentiment is returned or accepted. I extend love to them anyway.

I felt as though I just stood under a clear waterfall. Thank you, Amanda, for reminding me to give my gratitude a voice (oops! Does that make 6?

Read Full Post »